Remembering

Another guest post from one of the amazing women on the Resolve boards.



Things I will never forget about my infertility journey.


I remember the excitement of taking the home pregnancy tests every month and the inevitable disappointment minutes later.

I remember sitting at the Cheesecake factory when my OBGYN called. I remember her telling me that all my fertility tests came back normal and my husband’s sperm test did too. I remember feeling relief. Little did I know what was really ahead of me.

I remember sitting in the RE’S office and him being very concerned that “nothing was wrong on the papers and that we were so young.” I remember he mentioned IVF and me thinking “that’s what older celebrities did.”

I remember my scheduled call with the financial coordinator at my clinic advising me that I had no IVF coverage. I remember I was on vacation when they called and I just started crying and crying.

I remember the pain of the failed IUIs. I was so sure that they were going to work.

I remember going to an acupuncturist on a regular basis. Me, the person, who months before did not believe in acupuncture or any alternate medicines was now paying a lot of money to be pricked with needles.

I remember hating needles.

I remember the first projesterone shot and my husband running after me with the needle laughing sadistically.

I remember my first failed IVF and the doctor telling me they had no idea why it did not work.

I remember the hope I felt when we switched to the big NYC RE.

I remember the sadness I felt when IVF 2 at the big NYC Re did not work and he had no further answers.

I remember the incredible gas pains from the laparoscopy. How I was sure that drinking soda quickly and burping would help the gas.

I remember IVF 3 and all the excitement about trying again.

However, I also remember:

The laughs my husband and I had at the awkward moments at the RE doctor (there is nothing like hearing husband’s name to be called to go to make a deposit)

The elaborate brunches we treated ourselves to post IUIs, after doctor appointments, etc.

The many glasses of wine I treated myself to after getting negative betas.

The friends and family who cheered me up after every failed cycle.

The friends I made on through Resolve who where there for me every step on the way.

My interest family through Resolve who truly understood what I was going through.

The diamond earrings I bought myself before my first IVF as a present to myself.

And most of all, the call when I found out that I was pregnant!!!!!!